Book of Days

Book of Days    10/31/2011

Outside my window…The sun is shining brightly, the cows are lying in the pasture, and I can see my Morgan bathing in the sunlight in the front yard. (I’ve noticed that since my time with Craig, that I have picked up his habit of referring to things as “mine”. I don’t know if it’s an English thing, but Craig had a tendency to do this!)

My thoughts…Right this very second my thoughts are on “time”. It is pushing 1pm…I still have to package Craig’s tshirts for mailing…take a shower and get ready for school tonight…stop off at the UPS store and send the tshirts off to campusquilts.com (the company making the quilt)…go to Sears and get to school by 6pm.

Today’s quote…”Don’t ever take a fence down until you know the reason it was put up.” by Gilbert K Chesterton     I have many fences…some made of twigs, therefore they are easily destroyed. The fence that, without a doubt, is the one that will forever be impenetrable is the part of my heart that will forever belong to Craig. But just as Craig holds a portion of my heart…so does Sarge. The only difference is that Craig’s will forever be frozen in time with a love that will never be replaced. Sarge’s is ever evolving…ever growing with each passing day.

I am thankful for…that Craig left me in a financial state that allowed me to pay off all debt, pay for my schooling and quit work for the last 2 years so I could fulfill “our” dream of my getting a college education. I am also extremely thankful that Sarge supports me in a way that allows me to focus solely on school! He is there for me to cook and clean…bringing dinner to me as I sit at the computer writing Litigation Complaints and Answering Interrogatories. He is there for me emotionally on those days that I don’t want to look at one more powerpoint…would rather stay home than go to school…and when the memories/pain/anger of losing Craig cause me to have a breakdown

From my kitchen…I am preparing to make a vast assortment of cupcakes for my Public Speaking class. Why? (lmao) We have a demonstrative speech to give next week, therefore we must come up with a speech that lasts between 4 - 6 minutes and something we must be able to show “qualifications” for. Mine will be on “The simplicity of decorating a cupcake”. Having gone to Le Cordon Bleu while living in Arizona, I thought this would be a very simple project to undertake…and teach!

I am wearing…Black danskin workout pants and a cream colored Indian motorcycle long sleeve t-shirt

I am creating (crafts, sewing, etc)…I’m still working on the camouflage scarf I’m knitting for Sarge. Hopefully he’ll get to enjoy it this winter!

Becoming well read…As anyone who has seen the book “The Dome” by Stephen King…and knows what taking 7 classes does with all of your free time…know that I am still reading this book! Hopefully I will finish it within the next month! J

I manifest and co-create (my hopes, dreams, prayers)…I am hoping that our 2 week trip to Maine (Sarges’ hometown) will allow me the opportunity to see a Nor’easter! The northern states just experienced one this past weekend…getting up to 30” of snow in October!

Today’s melody…I’m Gonna Love You Through It  by: Martina McBride  (This song makes me think so much of my Mom and I cry every time I hear it!)

“When you’re weak, I’ll be strong
When you let go, I’ll hold on
When you need to cry, I swear that I’ll be there to dry your eyes
When you feel lost and scared to death,
Like you can’t take one more step
Just take my hand, together we can do it
I’m gonna love you through it.”

One of my favorite things…OMG! I love my Ugg boots!! I wore them this weekend while we were up in the mountains visiting my son…and not only are the warm, but they are so freaking comfortable! Why did I wait so long to buy a pair?!

Future plans for the week…Today I am sending Craig’s t-shirts off to have a memorial quilt made. On Friday my daughter and son-in-law will have their nephews up from Fayetteville. They have invited us spend Friday with them to go see the movie “Puss-in-Boots” and to Dave & Busters for dinner…which we are going to do.

Still Life…I remembered that today is the 29^th anniversary of mine and my first husband’s first date. Even though we are now divorced, we remain good friends (Sarge and I were at his house this past weekend)…and it made me think of this screensaver I had: